Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
he just called me skinny, hes either trying to get laid, or i'm going to have to marry this man
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
ill drive you to the airport today if we can have sex first
i left yesterday
ill pick you up from the airport on sunday if we can have sex after
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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