ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
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