Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(302): View more from Delaware

Nicole vs. Life

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(253): View more from Washington

Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.

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(303): View more from Colorado

So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?

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(541): View more from Oregon

I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore

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(847): View more from Illinois

Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?

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(217): View more from Illinois

I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?

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(586): View more from Michigan

I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.

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(650): View more from California

I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.

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