i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Duck, Duck, Goose is now the autocorrect, safe for work version of fuck, fuck, loose.
I'm both gender and math confused
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
Randomize
