I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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