We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
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