I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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