What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
he kissed both of us goodnight when we dropped him off...I didn't know if I was more offended or impressed
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Randomize