I'm jealous of your bromance
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Randomize
