i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
