Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
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