It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Randomize
