I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
Randomize
