please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
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