So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
Meanwhile she's getting her law degree and I'm dropping Cool Ranch Doritos down my bra because I'm laying down eating on the couch
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
There is a dude riding on one of those standing wheel things inside forever 21. Calm down.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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