Dual....:-)
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
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