it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
you know how they say when you die, your whole life flashed before you? well do you get to see what happened all the nights you blacked out?
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Randomize
