He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
I woke up pulling sunflower seeds out of my vagina. That kind of night.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
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