This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
If the EMT's ask later... I had 5 hour energy for breakfast and Four Loko for dinner... It might be important for them to know that
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Randomize
