the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
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