hotel room ftw
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
He's like a hurricane
a drunk, sexist, hurricane
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
