Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
Me ending up in the fetal position in my shower is becoming far too commonplace. It's like a weekly therapy session
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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