I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
