i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Randomize
