And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
Just FYI: if you happen to notice a liquid of some sort on my kitchen counter with an interesting color/ texture, don't taste it
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
