Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
A drawer in my room has nothing but a large feather quill, a wine glass, and a 15" Bowie knife. If you could put my life in a drawer I think that would be it.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
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