VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Let's paint friendship bongs
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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