I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
the number of desperate girls at the gym right now is unfair. it would be cruel not to let one blow me.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Randomize
