Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
I'm gonna write a song for the kids called "you're systematically killing your mother". In it I will explain that my recent hypertension and increase in smoking is due to them being dicks
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
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