I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
