I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Randomize
