Is it normal to miss your booty call?
she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
Randomize
