: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
Randomize