i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
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