on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
I'm just crazy horny about you
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
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