I want to have your abortion
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Randomize
