This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
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