We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
Randomize
