Buhtt sex?
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
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