Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
i'm currently connecting with my tribal roots aka i just found my recorder from 3rd grade music class... be ready for the recording
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
You know you're sufficiently drunk when the 411 dude just says, "Fuck it! I'll Google that shit for you, what movie do you want to see?" and proceeds to give you showtimes for 3 different theatres.
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
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