bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
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