he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
Randomize
