windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
Randomize
