Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
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