Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
smell my finger.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
Randomize
