when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
you would not believe what I got pierced last night...
son, I feel like that is a phrase a father never wants to hear.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Randomize