Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
If I have to give a UPS guy a lap dance, you owe me a drink.
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
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