i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
He said he was trying to live vicariously through me. I didn't have the heart to tell him that meant he was vicariously fucking his best friend.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
Randomize
