Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Randomize
