Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
why is there a clump of hair nailed to my wall?
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
I can't put those talents on a resume
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
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