I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
She straight up told me, "I don't care if he films as long as he's quiet." You sure you can't find the camera?
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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